I realize I have not written here in quite some time, or really at all so folks, folk, person, internet (who reads this?), I thought I’d give all y’all an update in listular form.

Ahem:

-I’ve been living here in the Scenic Lehigh Valley for six months. In those six months I sent out countless resumes, combed the local community on foot, via internet, flirted with the idea of temping. The result: I went on exactly 3 interviews. The third I was sure would not result in ultimate employment. I was overly tired having slept only two hours the night prior. I was positive it was visible. But ummm whatfuckingever America, they totes hired me. Just in time, as this week is my last of unemployment. I feel like I’m on my last week of summer vacation. In an inexplicable way that I will most likely come to regret, I CAN’T WAIT TO START.

-My dear, sweet Boy and I just returned from an old friend’s wedding in the Chicago area. It made me realize a whole bunch of things not only about MYSELF but about weddings in general.

    -In reference to myself: At 29 it seems I’m no different than 19. When placed in a room full of people I do not know, I am still somewhat reluctant, almost hesitant to strike up conversation with any strangers. I believe that those who know me would consider me a mostly friendly approachable type girl. But I’ve never really had patience for small talk. One of the most wonderful qualities about my fella is that he is pretty much the same way. BUT plant us in a room full of people we don’t know and it has tendency to make us appear very insular. The thing is…I kind of don’t care. YES, the revelation that I had at this wedding we attended, is that I juuuuusssst doooooon’t caaaaare.  Does this make me a terrible person? Antisocial? Guess what? Don’t fucking care. Anybody who gives a shit about me doesn’t care either? WHY DID I NEVER REALIZE THIS? How. Liberating. 

     -After all the wedding hoo hah of the past two years I am tired of the blogs and the pictures and the craft tutorials. At the end of the day a wedding should really just be an expression of what the couple wants to share with their guests. THAT’S IT. That’s alllllll it has to be. I hale from a land when every event/affair is overdone to death death death. It doesn’t have to be that way! I’ve seen it, adorably so, firsthand! The challenge in my lifetime will be proving this to a gigantic immediate family full of people who firmly believe the opposite. GAME. ON.

-I’ve had my bouts of homesickness over the course of these past six months. The things I miss are subtle. Places I’d frequent, people’s accents, the smell of the salty breeze when the tides would change, my family and how full they make my heart feel when I’m with them. All of these things I miss when I’m sitting here by myself are just feelings of attachment I’ve yet to develop for new things I’m discovering in other places. My family will always be somewhere. A text message, facebook commment, or phone call away to make me smile.

-I am so very happy to be here even when I’m having a crappy day and the dog just bit me for some nonsensical reason, or my MIL ate all of my sugarfree klondike bars that I just bought before we left while we were gone for 1.5 days (AN ACTUAL THING, THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED THAT DROVE ME TO NEAR INSANITY), or my darling PT’s work schedule seems crazy, or it’s too crappy for me to stroll outside, or there’s nothing on TV, or I haven’t really made new friends here, or I still feel like some strange animal completely out of it’s habitat…I’m still happy to be here, completely incredibly ecstatic to be here, in the same place, sharing space with the dude I love.

-That dude, I love him, like lots. I wish I could time travel to tell myself in my early 20’s to just chill the fuck out. A dude is going to come along, and all these other pretentious doofi are not worth the energy you are expending to try to keep it together. When it’s right it’s like breathing. So many years I spent sorta hating myself for not being something I thought would make things different for me. Ladies, don’t do this to yourself.

Now…my brain is empty.

More soon!